Hiya Monday, (eye roll)

You can’t see me roll my eyes, but I just did typing that greeting. Today, I ain’t feeling the enthusiasm I felt last week, making a promise to myself to write on this blog every Monday. SIGH. It is a commitment I spent the day regretting. I was planning to just wave my hand at the idea and move on, its not like anyone would notice anyway. No one was going to ring down my phone asking about my promised Monday posting. But…I would know. And I have to hold myself accountable. At the end of the day, we really only have ourselves. Of course, (hopefully) we have friends and family to turn to for support, but they can only do so much. You have to hold yourself accountable. You have to stand by yourself. I have to stand by myself, (and I don't mean physically stand, I just mean stand by your word, your commitments to yourself).

So, hello Monday. I am blessed to be alive, yes, but I wasn’t feeling today at all. Another two doctors appts coming up that are making me extremely anxious, consuming my thoughts, and souring my mood. So, today I was easy on myself. Watched some cheesy holiday movies, continued watching Harlem (cause that show is fire) drank tea with biscuits (cause that’s comfort food for me) and washed my hair (cause that’s self care, even if I hate doing it, it is a whole ass job, lol).

It is little things, just these simple little things that seem insignificant, but are extremely significant for someone like me, someone who has a mental illness. I got out of bed. I got out of my head. I watched shows that made me laugh, instead of cry. I treated myself. I gave my hair some love. I wrote this blog. I got out of my head. When all I really wanted to do was stay in bed and be miserable. I refused. This is a win. It is small, and easy to miss, but it is a win nonetheless, and I pat myself on the back regardless. To my fellow warriors, ya gotta be easy on yourself, and celebrate the little things. All steps deserve praise, no matter how small.

Until next time,

With love,

Teya